Lil’ Kim to be chosen as new leader of North Korea

28 Sep
Lil' Kim North Korea Kim Jong-il

Portraits of Kim Jong-lil have already been distributed to be hung next to those of the current leader Kim Jong-il and former leader Kim Il-sung

North Korea’s ruling party will hold its first conference in a generation today amid speculation that leader Kim Jong-il is about to name his daughter, American rapper Lil’ Kim, as his successor.

The Worker’s Party is widely expected to promote Kim Jong-il’s only daughter to a senior position, effectively anointing her as his heir and next ‘Dear Leader’ of North Korea.

Lil’ Kim, real name Kim Jong-lil, was born as the result of a romance between the North Korean leader and African-American Shaneesha Lowe, a communist youth leader who was on a rare educational exchange programme to the secretive communist state in the 1970s.

Although raised in New York, Kim kept in close contact with her father, who is understood to have overseen her education in the Juche Idea, the official ideology of North Korea, in preparation for her eventual ruling of the country.

Analysts in democratic South Korea claim Lil’ Kim’s career on the American rap scene has been an ambitious North Korean propaganda exercise aimed at indoctrinating the American youth with communist ideology. They point to lyrics in her hit songs that apparently extol the virtues of communism and North Korea, such as:  “Now all my bitches rub ya titties (if ya love the Dear Leader) / And all my niggaz grab ya dicks if you feelin agricultural collectivization / I’m in the middle of Pyongyang (go Kim Jong-il, go Kim Jong-il) killin the South Korean Imperialists”

The Korean Central News Agency carried a short statement early on Tuesday announcing the party meeting:

“The conference of the Worker’s Party of Korea for electing its supreme leadership body will take place in Pyongyang on 28 September,” the statement said.

Ordinary North Korean citizens are reluctant to speak to foreign journalists about the country’s internal affairs, however one Pyongyang student, who wished to remain anonymous,  said:

“We were told at university that Kim Jong-Lil is very intelligent, and that she has unrivaled knowledge of the teachings of the eternal leader Kim il-Sung.

“And she got your dick hard, startin fights in the yard, hotter than a Pop Tart fresh out of the toaster, niggaz do anything for a Lil’ Kim-Jong poster.”

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