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Cheryl Cole releases fitness DVD: Fight Yourself Thin

10 Dec

Cheryl Cole Fitness DVD Fight Yourself Thin Seleb Spy 2010

NATIONAL treasure Cheryl Cole releases her debut fitness DVD Fight Yourself Thin this Christmas.

Ladies, have you had a bit too much chocolate this Christmas? Piled on a few extra pounds already? By Boxing Day your husband will be disgusted by the sight of you, and he will be sticking it in that nice blonde piece next door by New Year’s Day.

You need Cheryl Cole’s brand new workout DVD Fight Yourself Thin.

National treasure Cheryl shows you how you can achieve the figure you’ve always dreamed of – through fighting!

Our Chezza says: “People always ask me how I stay so thin. And I tells them: fookin’ fightin’!”

Leading dietitians and doctors from around the world agree that the best calorie-burning workout is a good old-fashioned fight.

And who better to teach us how to combine fighting and weight loss than Cheryl Cole, one of the nation’s thinnest and most violent celebrities.

Cheryl added: “The lessons in fightin’ you’ll learn on me DVD can be applied to all areas of yer daily life.

“You can fight at the office, fight at the shops, fight at home, fight in a Guildford nightclub’s toilets over a lollipop.

“Did you know that in ten minutes of fighting you burn more calories than an hour of jogging?

“You don’t fookin’ believe me? Well I’ll fookin’ smash yer lights out man!”

But don’t just take Cheryl’s word for it – even if she threatens to cave your face in with an iron bar – read these amazing testimonials from real women like you who have fought themselves thin.

Rotund housewife Valerie Ferracci from Manchester said: “When me boyfriend comes home from the pub stinking of ale, I used to just shout at him and call him a useless piss-head.

“Now, after watching Cheryl’s DVD, whenever the bastard annoys me in the slightest, I batter the shit out of him.

“And I lose weight at the same time! It’s great!”

So don’t delay, ladies, order Cheryl Cole’s Fight Yourself Thin today and get fighting! The first thousand customers will receive a free broken bottle.

You’ve got to fight, fight, fight, fight, fight yourself thin. Because being thin is worth fighting for.


Exclusive Reader’s Offer: Mary Byrne’s Debut Album

21 Nov

Mary Byrne X Factor 2010

SELEB SPY is proud to exclusively bring you the long-awaited debut album of rotund X Factor contestant Mary Byrne, With Added Gravy.

A magical collection of the nation’s best-loved classics, and some trendy new songs from the hit parade, With Added Gravy is a must have album for music lovers of all ages.

Mary Byrne is the popstar for the recession generation and has a truly unforgettable voice crafted from years of alcohol and tobacco abuse.

She belts out the high notes, she belts out the low notes, and she belts out the notes that should never be belted out.

With Added Gravy tracklist:

1. Diamonds are Forever (Shirley Bassey)
2. It´s a Man´s World (James Brown)
3. My Neck, My Back (Khia)
4. Could it Be Magic (Barry Manilow)
5. Gotta Tell You (Samantha Mumba)
6. Danny Boy

And the exclusive new song:

7. Transfer your Clubcard Points to my Heart

Critics are literally queuing – Tesco style – to heap praise on Mary Byrne´s With Added Gravy. And if the queue is too long Mary will open another check-out.

Or suggest they use the self-service check-out.

Rolling Stone
“The best bingo wings in pop”

Cheryl Cole
“This album is right up my street!”

Simon Cowell
“Mary’s debut album is potentially the best thing I’ve heard all morning. Having said that, I did just hear my dog fart and that did sound better than Mary.

“And smelt better too.”

This future classic LP is available on 12″, Cassette and state-of-the art Compact Disc exclusively from

All major credit / debit cards, cash, cheque, child trust fund vouchers, luncheon vouchers, gold fillings accepted.

Exclusive Reader’s Offer: Cheryl Cole Collector’s Plate

26 Sep

Cheryl Cole X Factor Plate

It truly is an honour to witness Cheryl Cole blossom into a national treasure, and this magnificent machine-painted collector’s plate is the perfect way to celebrate her beauty, grace and wisdom.

Crafted from 100% non-racist porcelain this exquisite plate can be yours for only £39.99 + P&P.

All major credit & debit cards, cheques, and Child Trust Fund vouchers accepted.

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